I knew that this was Mom's day to take off early from work to clean the house, and I wanted nothing to do with the house during that time. If I was ar...und, Mom would find jobs for me, so I always avoided her on that day. As a result, I stayed away until almost supper time. I always had a reasonable excuse for not being there, but I am sure that Mom knew the real reason for my absence.Anyway, for some reason I never delved into, Dad came home early, and Mom met him at the door with her story. Somewhere in the pink mists, though, she maintained enough blood flow to HER brain to regain control at the last minute. Saturday morning she was still a virgin.At one o'clock we stood in front of a happy, informal group of friends and neighbors and Reverend Paul led us through a time-honored ritual of vows. We exchanged rings and kisses and turned to face the assembly."Brothers and sisters," the preacher said, "Let me present Mister Dave Johnson and his wife, Mizzus Ronni Johnson. He smiled. My neighbor, Paul, came around behind me and slapped my bare ass."We gonna have some fun now, Lois. I'm gonna deliver some pizza to your back door then I'm gonna give you a pizza butt fuck, bitch."Paul laughed as the rest of the black studs yelled and cheered. In the background, I heard a gong and Raj called out my name. I knew he was yelling another customer for Lois Kubik's tits and pussy. But all our customers already had my tits and pussy and I was loving it.A grinning Raj brought a large. Peng couldn't be prouder. And Tina even made Pei-Hua a bridesmaid.The lavish event got started at 9am and didn't finish until 2am the following morning. We sweated out the interminable tea ceremony, and Pei-Hua had to massage my back muscles during a break from all the bowing. But the sheer volume of red envelopes we collected made me feel much better about the whole thing.The banquet went on and on incessantly, and by the time my drunken relatives started singing karaoke I signaled the emcee.
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