I turned my face slowly away and opened my eyes. Around the room lay remnants of my life, things that had meant something to me once, things that lay ...s dead and lifeless as I felt. My flute lay on the floor, sheet music scattered all around. The memories haunted me. Images of my playing, my total surrender to the power of the notes and the melody brought a fresh rush of tears to my eyes. I had spent many years practicing and perfecting the talent of musician. There was a freedom of expression. Why don't you die."The pain was enormous; vast. World sized. I should have burst from itand expired, but couldn't. Words don't come close enough. If 1 is nopain and 10 the worst you've ever felt, how does the pain feel now?Seventeen fucking billion and climbing. I felt everything they did,every injection, every intervention, every way they tried to make mycrumpled body more comfortable when any other person should already bedead.When the helicopter landed I finally passed out to wake an. “Are you wearing my little gift?” he asked. “Yes I am,” as I blushed a little. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out this small remote and holds it up and winks at me. He has a very evil little smile on his face. “Did you leave the other box unopened as I instructed?” he questioned. “Yes I sure did its sitting on the foot my bed.” I replied in my usual shy way. He leans over and kissing my neck and up to my ear. “You won’t know when and you won’t know where I am going to turn this on and. "Then I'd sure like to know what it has to do with." Never mind. It's just not you, that's all. You'll just have to trust me. I'm telling the truth."Her roommate Staci was home too, bustling around the kitchen. Fawn didn't want to discuss it in her presence."I guess I'll have to," Jeff snapped again. "I'm sure not getting satisfied in any other way." Oh Jeff, all you think about is screwing," Fawn said. "It won't hurt you to take a little rest from it for a while." That sounds easy for you to.
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