But Alexa didn't want me driving–that was one of her rules."That way it kept the insurance rates down and she didn't have to worry about registratio..., me keeping a driver's license, or any of the extra hassles of having two drivers in the house. Besides, it was her way of keeping tabs on me. Without a car, I couldn't go out without her knowing," Nikki said."I think that was the main point, to be honest," I said. "Well, no matter. I'm not going to be that repressive or governing. I want you to. Don't you daddy?" and as she said that she slowly trailed one of her fingers up the side of my leg, to my hand and up my arm."Erm...yes...no..no Louise. You have to go to college" I weakly spat out.Her next response threw me even more."But daddy, after what just happened, I need to relax. All these feelings I am feeling. Maybe I should talk to mum about them after college if you are so sure that I should go" she said, this time moving her face closer to mine. Her lips inches from mine. Her hand. I couldn't believe she was gone. I grabbed her wrist,desperately feeling for a pulse, even though I knew there wouldn't beone. Still, I had to try. I didn't know what else to do.I had no idea how long I sat on the floor beside my mom's body, myemotions swirling between grief and rage. I had just lost my mom, theonly family that I had left. But I hadn't just lost her. She had beentaken away...murdered. Someone had done this to her. Someone hadmurdered her, and I didn't even have any idea. Of course, I wanted to all day long. I would spend allday thinking of how I could get him to like me. I hoped against hope thathe would, someday, want to come to my house and hang out with me.Okay, I'll be totally honest: I wanted to hold that body against my own.I knew he would be head and shoulders taller than me, even with me inheels. I wanted to be in heels, hugging him and letting him rock me inhis arms. I dreamed of kissing his bare chest and running my hands overhis muscles. I could see.
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