It was apparent to me early on that the lifestyle of a city campus was very dispersed. I had desperately searched the lecture theatre and later the gr...unds for anyone I might know, without luck. To make things worse I had to pay through the teeth for huge 1500 page text books. I decided to go home and get started on some readings – start as I mean to go on was my plan for success. The next day I felt refreshed. I realised I had many years of this ahead of me and in that time I would make good. Phir message aana band ho gaya. Raat ko uska message aaya.She- SorryMe- Tum sorry kyun bol rahi ho?She- Main tum par chillai, magar mujhee bhi acha laga.Mera man khushi se phoola nahi sama raha tha.She – Mere ghar aa sakte ho abhi?Me – Abhi? Kisi ne dekh liya to?She – Building ka gate khula rahta hai aur lift se sidhe ghar mein aa jana!Me – Thik Hai.Main tayar hokar, jaisa usne bataya, waise hi uske ghar gaya. Wo cotton shorts aur t-shirt mein thi. Andar ghuste mein door lock kiya aur usko. Messy. But over.The biggest shock is seeing yourself, knowing it’s you. Knowing you ain’t there anymore. It’s something the newly deceased has to get used to.Being dead.It can be a shock!It was a shock to me I have to admit. For some it can take a long time to come to grips with the new state of being ... or of not being. Of course, that is until you get used to the idea, and pardon the expression, “Live with it!”Back to my dark and stormy night.I guess the plan of my executioner was to mask. My Mother asked Jess to stay whilst she got some rest I think Jess was glad it was just the two of us. The nurses came to check up on me and give more tablets one mentioned how Jess had saved my life by doing CPR until the doctors and nurses took over. Jess played it down and made little of it I would hear more later.After the nurses had gone I asked Jess about it as we were on our own Jess spoke quietly ‘I love you with all my heart I gave you the greatest gift I could there is no way I’m.
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